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Thursday, June 15, 2006

Evil Canadien Geese Destroying Lake Tahoe

In a recent story, Lake Tahoe pollution has been linked with Canadien geese. Local residents have begun implementing a two phase plan to ensure that this pollution is stopped.

PHASE 1: Offensive Measures
The first step in their brilliant plan is to launch an offensive strike to push the calculating geese back and take control of the battle front. This will be accomplished by having all the residents purchase shotguns and blowing the crap out of the northern flyers. Some residents are hesitant about resorting to violence but will do what is required to protect their beloved lake.

PHASE 2: Hit Them at Their Home
The second phase is to drive them all the way back to Canada. Well, that was the initial plan but why stop there? We know the Canadiens have trained these Geese to do their bidding but our intelligence has yet to gather concrete evidence of these "weapons of mass destruction," so we do not have cause to enter the Evil Empire's (AKA Canada) borders just yet. We will have to wait and see what our intelligence office can turn up.

If we ban together, we can stop this threat before it becomes a nation-wide epidemic!

3 Comments:

Blogger jbwritergirl said...

Nice to see someone else out there with a sense for news (real or made up). Question: Are you Canadian?

Look forward to reading more of your blog. Thanks for checking mine out. I will be posting live shortly so stay tuned!

PS: Why no profile or are you in the witness protection program?

9:09 AM  
Blogger Bill Diamond said...

No excuses! Just solutions! Count me in. Although I should warn you, I'm not going to be much good to you in the "blowing the crap" out of them department. Don't like guns. I'm more of a "politely ask them if they'd ever consider possibly taking a goosedump somewhere else" type. And if they say they hadn't ever considered that possibility, that's when you show them a brochure or something. Let me know if I can help.

11:28 AM  
Blogger Brianna Pickens said...

LOL

Good to see someone has a sense of humor about this thing.

Anyone know what goose tastes like? I mean, why not use the meat if the birds get shot? Think of all the news meals the casinos could have! Goose kebabs, goose under glass, goose burgers, goose stir fry, filet migoose ....

3:35 PM  

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